My Red Truck

CIRCA 2001

My Dearest Red Toyota Truck,

As I sit down to write this letter, my heart overflows with emotions for you, my cherished companion. Words fail to capture the depth of my love and gratitude for the countless memories we’ve shared. I want to sincerely apologize for any mishaps or neglect you may have endured on our journey. You deserved so much better.

As a purpose built hostage rescue machine, I deeply regret the modifications you had to undergo, as if stripping you down could ever diminish your worth. Who could be so blind as to overlook the value of the radio and speakers during our long nights together? In my eyes, every component of your being reflects your character and the joy you brought to my life.

Please know that I’ve always made it my priority to be there for you, attending to your needs with unwavering dedication. Each time we stopped, I would tap the dust out of your air cleaner, ensuring you were in the best condition possible. However, there were occasions when external circumstances, like that incident with the seals and the janky ass fucking machine gun mount, showed no respect and may have caused some discomfort. Please understand that my intention was always to protect you.

Do you remember the exhilarating moments when we embarked on daring adventures, conquering treacherous roads together? I can still vividly recall our laughter as we counted the bumpy bottom outs, celebrated our resilience and bruised kidneys. We even reached the astonishing count of 9 during that unforgettable drive from Bagram to J-Bad. Those shared experiences, pissing blood from the bumps seemingly insignificant to some, are etched forever in my heart.

Another memory eternally ingrained within me is when we loaded the Casa 212 on a seemingly innocent journey to acquire beef jerky and pop tarts, only to be surprised by fate with something more extraordinary, a singleton mission. Even when physically apart, my thoughts never strayed far from you. In every moment of separation, my heart longed for your reassuring presence.

We always managed to secure the most coveted parking spaces, far away from any fecal matter. Those moments of solitude became our sanctuary, where our bond grew stronger amidst the mere fecal chaos of the world.

There were instances when our dear friends, Hooper, Lurch, Scrawny, and even the Admiral, unintentionally left their mark on your seats. After the shit smell dissipated, while not the most pleasant experience, it only served as a testament to the camaraderie and memories we shared. Through these imperfect moments, our connection became unbreakable.

And let us not forget that vibrant red paint, a symbol of our audacious spirit and thirst for adventure. Together, we braved unknown territories, our hearts pounding with excitement as we faced every ambush and new mortar attack.

My dear truck, I yearn for your presence and long for the days we spent together. You embody loyalty and strength, an inseparable part of my existence. Know that my love for you knows no bounds. Every dent, every scratch, every shit stain and every memory we share speaks to the depth of my affection.

With each passing day, my devotion grows stronger, my love more profound. You are not merely a truck; you are the embodiment of our journey, the symbol of our unwavering connection. May the road ahead be filled with adventure and love, for I eagerly await the day when we can once again embark on new escapades, united as we take on all comers kill everyone we see… again. Hopefully the locker room smell dissipates a little before then lol.

Forever and always, I remain yours, deeply and unconditionally.

With all the love in my heart,

John Shrek McPhee

Circa 2001